Friends.

Isn't it great when two of your friends (unbeknownst to each other) have exactly the same problem? And they both ask you what you think? And you don't have any kind of good answer? I think it's great. Because it is ironic. But also because it is depressing and sad and it means that two friends have the same sucky question to answer. Sigh.
In other news, I hate George R R Martin for lying to me. He said that the bloody book, A Feast for Crows was going to be published this week, but no. Instead, it isn't coming out until November 8!! God, that is forever away. I was counting on that book to get me through the rest of the summer. I guess I'll just have to turn to my Directed Studies readings earlier than I thought. And I have 30 days left with my family, 26 for the rest of the world. It is coming quickly now. But I am becoming genuinely excited and pleased about it, in large part because I know have access to OCI (Online Course Information) and Facebook. But also because I am ready to be busy again. As much as I love getting enough sleep ALL THE TIME, I am really looking forward to being productively engaged. And also, as much as I love my friends (I really do, guys), I am ready to start meeting new people. I have full intentions of preserving all my old friendships, because I would hate to see them suffer unduly. You know what I mean.
I want my computer! I want my iPod! I am getting them soon, but I want them now!!

Facebook!

Hurray! I got my Yale email address last night! So, this of course means that I am now on the Facebook. Facebook me! It is eating my life, but also conviniently my time. Again, my life falls into the pattern of a few jam-packed days followed by many empty days. Full, empty, empty, empty, full, empty, empty...

Thinking

I realized today that I very rarely think about what actually makes me happy. This is not to say that I do not have ideas about what makes me happy, but I think that these are mostly scattered. There is no easily discernible pattern. What I do know:
1. Past regrets are not really holding me back. Sure, there are things I wish could unsay or undo. But seeing as this is particularly unlikely to happen, I consider myself pretty good at letting most things go. (This is despite the fact that I know full well that I sometimes hold grudges, though I think that these are rarely against people I actually know. I am much more likely to hold a grudge against a larger entity. Walmart, for example. Also, people I don't know, such as Mr. Rove.)
2. Contentment is not the same as happiness. It just is not enough to be content, though contentment certainly has a place in the grand scheme of happiness. It is probably impossible to be happy without first having some measure of contentment. But contentment seems a shallow measure of pleasure and happiness can be much broader, including things like joy, pride, and satisfaction that aren't necessarily included in contentment.
3. I'm not really sure what does restrain my all-out happiness. While I feel a little strange classing this under "What I know," it is always good to acknowledge the gaps in your information. This is a critical one, which I must think about more. Perhaps if I could come to a helpful conclusion, it would give my life some more direction and give me a little more guidance. If not, it simply means that I know myself better than did before, nothing I will ever complain about.
4. I don't think about these kinds of questions unbidden most of the time. It usually requires some external motivation to figure it out, such as a question or a book or some other outside stimulus. I find this to be a big problem with myself, as I tend to criticize myself for not thinking enough. Also, it is hard for me to be truly clear about some point that I am trying to express if I am limited to my silent thoughts. It comes along much better when put in writing or exchanged in a conversation.
All in all, I am writing mostly because of this last point. At the moment, there is no one here and I cannot share my thoughts on the subject except by writing them down or talking to myself. I do enough of the latter to mean that this is a nice change of pace. So there you go.

Movies in the Park

Here is the schedule for the movies in the park. Want to go?
Jul. 12: 8:59 p.m. "Citizen Kane"
Jul. 19: 8:54 p.m. "Annie Hall"
Jul. 26: 8:48 p.m. "My Darling Clementine"
Aug. 2: 8:39 p.m. "E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial"
Aug. 9: 8:30 p.m. "The Night of the Hunter"
Aug. 16: 8:20 p.m. "The Hustler"
Aug. 23: 8:09 p.m. "Star Wars"

Also, there are some neat looking concerts coming up soon...
TETZLAFF PLAYS BRAHMS
Wednesday, July 13 at 6:30 p.m.
Jay Pritzker Pavilion
Grant Park Orchestra; James Paul, Conductor; Christian Tetzlaff, Violin
COPLAND
Quiet City
ARNOLD
Symphony No. 2
BRAHMS
Violin Concerto in D Major
Internationally renowned violinist Christian Tetzlaff makes his Grant Park debut at this concert in Brahms’ heart rending violin concerto.

RUSSIAN IMPRESSIONS
Friday, July 15 at 6:30 p.m.
Saturday, July 16 at 7:30 p.m.
Jay Pritzker Pavilion
Grant Park Orchestra; James Paul, Conductor
RIMSKY KORSAKOV
Capriccio espagnol
PROKOFIEV
Lieutenant Kije Suite
SHOSTAKOVICH
Symphony No. 6 in B minor
Two Russian favorites and one of Shostakovich’s middle symphonies share equal billing at these midseason concerts.

SUITES FOR ORCHESTRA
Wednesday, July 20 at 6:30 p.m.
Jay Pritzker Pavilion
Grant Park Orchestra; James Paul, Conductor
BIZET
L'Arlesienne Suite No. 2
DOHNANYI
Suite in F Sharp Minor
GINASTERA
Ballet Suite from Estancia
From Bizet’s famous and frenetic Farandole to Ginastera’s Latin rhythms, this concert offers three very different and colorful orchestral suites.

Damn it!

Few things are quite as subtely depressing as watching Oprah late at night. It sucks. I have obviously never done this awful thing.
Clearly.

Another news article I thought I would share with you.

Astrologer Sues NASA Over Comet Probe

By Associated Press
Published July 5, 2005, 12:35 PM CDT

MOSCOW -- NASA's mission that sent a space probe smashing into a comet raised more than cosmic dust -- it also brought a lawsuit from a Russian astrologer.

Marina Bai has sued the U.S. space agency, claiming the Deep Impact probe that punched a crater into the comet Tempel 1 late Sunday "ruins the natural balance of forces in the universe," the newspaper Izvestia reported Tuesday. A Moscow court has postponed hearings on the case until late July, the paper said.

Scientists say the crash did not significantly alter the comet's orbit around the sun and said the experiment does not pose any danger to Earth.

The probe's comet crash sent up a cloud of debris that scientists hope to examine to learn how the solar system was formed.

Bai is seeking damages totaling $300 million -- the approximate equivalent of the mission's cost -- for her "moral sufferings," Izvestia said, citing her lawyer Alexander Molokhov. She earlier told the paper that the experiment would "deform her horoscope."

NASA representatives in Russia could not be reached for comment on the case.

So, this is pretty great. It's a pretty good commentay on Science v. Religion. Keep going-it's part of a little series. I've been spending a lot of time reading these excellent Dinosaur Comics. Each strip has exactly the same image with different text. It's a pretty excellent medium, thogh I was highly skeptical at first. Though Ian advised me to start at the beginning, and I have found this to be good advice so far. They make for very entertaining reading. They have been keeping me busy.
Sometimes, I do a damn good job of keeping myself busy. It is at times like this when I get about 4 hours of sleep on at least two consecutive nights (like the last two...), and then I cease functioning as a normal human being and begin to talk about absurd things like drinking games based on calculus or what truly matters in life instead of holding perfectly normal conversations about fireworks and food and such. Anyway, today my feet made a new enemy (my shoes), and they are complaining about this loudly right now.I have a whole bunch of blisters and several damn inconveineit calluses. I also watched the movie Alien. It wasn't actually a sci-fi movie, because it was actually a horror movie. Even still, it was entertaining. I also got to eat three meals today (I don't actually remember the last time that happened. Since school ended, I have been eating on a terrible and erratic schedule, and some days I hardly eat at all. Even though I ate light at all three meals, it was good because I actually ate like normal people! Hurray. There are few enough things where I really feel normal. You know how that goes.)
And so I had a good day. And it finishes well- with Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Not a great movie, but a few of the shootout sequences are pretty cool. Though overall, the fight scenes are cool and interesting. The plot is entirely summarized by the commercials, but who went to see that movie for the plot? Duh.
Remind me to write about being obsessive sometime.

Sandra! Noooooo!

So, the news is everywhere. My mailbox is full of emails from liberal lobbyist groups, asking me for money to fund the coming war over the idiot President Bush is bound to nominate. Just yesterday, I regretfully threw out a People for the American Way letter about the balance of the supreme court (also asking for money). I threw it away because I didn't think that this was going to happen quite like this. I suspected that evil Rehnquist would e the first to go, owing to his thyroid cancer. But no, it had to be one of the more moderate ones! At least it was a consesrvative, instead of a true moderate. But the implications for this are very frightening, and it could mean that some things start to change for the worse come October (when they start their next session). I think I may just donate to PFAW or some similar group. That three sentence letter has me quaking in my boots.
If you are of a similar mindset, perhaps you should sign up for their email action alerts, at PFAW. They are often not asking for money- they also want you to write or email or call your representatives and senators or sign petitions. I am not convinced of the efficacy of the petitions, but it's a lot of fun to get letters in the mail from your senators. The best part is the postage- their signature in blue ink. (Confused? Go look up the franking privilege.)

Awesome.

Need I say more?

I love you Canada! I love you Spain!

This is why I love Canada.
This is why I love Spain.
Hurray.

Society for Creative Anachromism Siezes Control of Russia

Society for Creative Anachromism Siezes Control of Russia
MOSCOW—Official reports from the Kremlin Tuesday confirmed that the Society for Creative Anachronism, a group of medieval-wargames hobbyists, seized control of Russia in a bloodless coup over the weekend.
Above: SCA members guard the recently seized St. Basil's Cathedral.
"Weakened by food shortages, political instability and widespread economic chaos, our military's combined forces proved no match for the enemy's rattan-and-duct-tape broadswords and homemade weaponry," said deposed Russian president Boris Yeltsin during a national radio address in which he relinquished rulership to the "Principality Of The Mists," one of several dozen SCA "kingdoms."
"I can't tell you how humiliating this is," he added.
The SCA, founded in 1966 by a group of Berkeley science-fiction and fantasy fans, is a non-profit organization dedicated to fun and learning through such medieval activities as metalwork, calligraphy, lute-playing and brewing. Boasting more than 20,000 dues-paying members in 14 countries, the club is also known for holding elaborately staged mock battles, followed by feasting and merrymaking amid the revelry of troubadours and jesters.
The seizure of over 70% of Russia's land mass marks the first time the SCA has ventured into the arena of international politics.
"I can't believe how easy it was to claim Kiev for the Kingdom Of Ealdormere," said Royal Peer Gawain Falconsfyre, a 44-year-old tech-support assistant from a suburb of Toronto. "It was a piece of cake. Haven't any of these Russians ever heard of a moving-shield-wall offense?"
Falconsfire and an SCA faction armed only with rubber maces successfully captured two Russian tank divisions outside Moscow Saturday when fuel shortages immobilized the armored vehicles.
Due to the disarray of communications within Russia, information regarding the actual invasion is sketchy. It was confirmed, however, that St. Petersburg was taken without a shot being fired late Saturday morning, after thousands of Russian soldiers deserted their posts, joining approximately 70 SCA knights advancing on the city in hopes of being issued new boots and coats.
The SCA also overtook vast areas at the borders of former Russian republics Ukraine and Belarus simply by trading several sacks of potatoes for enemy guns.
Above: Former president Boris Yeltsin transferring control of Russia to Grand Seneschal Ulf Silverhawk.
"Forsooth, mine legions of brave warmakers hath conquered the Lands West O' the Urals! Let there be great rejoicing in our noble victory!" exclaimed Cedric, Bard of the House of Æthelmearc, 36, hoisting a flagon of ale. "What, ho! Bring on the serving wenches!"
Cedric, known as Harold Freed when among non-SCA members, is credited with capturing two military air bases and a string of missile installations throughout the north Caucasus region along the Georgian border—an area rendered vulnerable by ethnic infighting, corruption and military anarchy.
SCA leaders, who have called the weekend's campaign "a really good time," were said to be especially pleased with the invasion's early wrap-up, as it left the remainder of the weekend free for social recreation in the form of mead-drinking, archery contests, and the singing of bawdy madrigals.
Even captured Russian soldiers were invited to join in the fun and campfire dancing. Such "good sportsmanship" has some analysts arguing that the SCA's power base in Russia may even benefit the troubled land in the long run.
"Though civilian rioting and widespread starvation still rock the major population centers, Russia is actually more stable right now than it has been for the last 18 months," Harvard political science professor F. Horace Gunderson said. "Candle-dipping seminars are addressing the problems posed by energy shortages, and the booths selling roasted turkey legs represent, in many regions, the first source of food in weeks."
"This could be the best thing to happen to Russia in years," agreed State Department foreign-affairs analyst Howard Plum. "The sale of jewelry, driftwood art and other medieval handcrafting at concession tables throughout Russia has boosted local economies, and SCA presence has even created new jobs in the custodial and campground-rental fields."
The U.N. security council is drafting a proposal urging SCA forces to remain in Russia, at least until a more viable interim government can be structured.
"Under the current political system, the Russian people face Mafia domination of the black market and a deteriorating national infrastructure," U.N. Ambassador Thomas R. Pickering said. "With an elaborately networked consortium of amateur gamers in charge, however, there will at least be some semblance of order."
Members of SCA nobility, however, say the group has no interest in running Russia for any great length of time, especially with the members' need to prepare for their next major event, this summer's Pennsic War between the East and Middle Kingdoms, to be held in Pennsylvania. Insiders expect the occupying forces to return power to the Russian government "on the honor system" and return to their day jobs by the end of the week.
"We're doing this for fun, not the vulgar acquisition of personal political power," said insurance actuary and Arizona native Willownook Pendragon, of the Kingdom of Atenveldt. "We're here to celebrate our mutual interest in the ways and customs of pre-1600 feudal Europe, and to bedeck ourselves in the heraldic regalia of our fictional medieval personas, not to get mixed up in politics."
Pendragon added that "anyone who wants to have a fun time and make new friends" should check out the SCA home page or contact the group's California headquarters directly at its toll-free number for more information on an SCA chapter in their area.
"We're really just friendly folks who welcome outsiders," Pendragon said. "Plus, now is a great time to get involved, because there's lots of super events coming up this summer, and you'll want time to prepare the correct blazon for your heraldry."

I love it. I love it so much.

La la la...

So, I doubt that anyone actually went to that concert. I didn't even go. I was at a baseball game in Milwaukee, and we waited in a parking lot for a long long time before getting onto the parking lot (I 94). So, after thhe many hours stuck sitting in a hot car, I opted out of the concert. There are more, though, and I intend to go to them.
And, I have another bridge game tomorrow morning before Claire's party. I'm pleased by that, though I fear that it will go as poorly as the last one did. Sigh. I really did get reamed that night. And I haven't done anything to help myself since then. There are just so many things to do. Reading bridge books is a hard habit to get into, especially when there are such entertaining things as crossword puzzles. Damn things. I bought the evil paper today, just because I wanted that crossword. I felt a little bad about that, too.
Oh well. At some point, when it isn't so oppressively hot, perhaps I will write about my obsessive tendancies.

Oh no!

This new article casts doubts on the solar sail mission. They fear that it might not have seperated from it's rocket booster pack, which would be very sad. I would mourn the loss of the private investment more than the same amount in government money. I hope all is well with the Cosmos-1.
Also, there is this concert in Millenium Park on Thursday. I am going to try to go. Perhaps you would like to go also?
Thursday, June 23 at 6:30 p.m.
Jay Pritzker Pavilion
Grant Park Orchestra; Carlos Kalmar, Conductor; Karina Gauvin, Soprano
MOZART Exsultate, jubilate
MAHLER Symphony No. 4 in G Major
Mozart and Mahler’s works share a common vision of heaven. Karina Gauvin, soon to be one of Grant Park’s favorite sopranos, wowed audiences last year with her celestial renditions of Handel and Faure.
One more thing. I had this dream last night, where I was the First Lady. I was trying to call Laura, to give her some decorating advice or something, and I was trying to leave my name with the secretary, but I couldn't remember my last name. I guess that is pretty appropriate, considering my unmarried status. But the dream got me to thinking. I would probably be an unsaavy choice as mate. I am white, pretty liberal, and from Illinois, not even close to a swing state. But it also made me think that perhaps if such a thing came to pass, it would simply be indicative of the fact that I was chosen for my personal qualities, not my political capital. That certainly would be the better way to do things, though I can't forget the old saying "Every good marriage begins in tears."

Finally impressed

It is so rare that a sentence in a science fiction or fantasy book really stands out to me for beauty. Occasionally for simplicity, weight, narrative value, or poor writing. But almost never for beauty. So I decided I had to share this sentence from Roger Zelazny's Lord of Light.
"A sea of turbulent light appeared overhead, and three times spilled streams that rode crazy crescendo down to splash upon the stone fang curving blackly into the wind, about a quarter mile up the slope."
I especially like the phrase "crazy crescendo."

Good Morrow to our Waking Souls

Space! Hurray. I like the idea of a space craft that uses solar sails. The idea just seems so classy. I really hope it works as well as it is predicted to-- it would be really great. Also, the mere fact that the mission is privately funded is fantastic. Though I certainly don't like the idea that governments are spending less and less on science, and therefore less and less on space missions, I am pleased that people in the private sector care enough to fund this (very very cheap) mission. Of course, this technology won't be practical outside the near planets, really, because the "solar wind" the sails are powered by won't be strong enough too far from the sun. But still. I heartily approve.
And some sad personal news... Sean, at Preposterous Universe is "going on vacation." Bummer. He always has such interesting things to say, even if he hasn't posted anything about cosmology in a rather long while. I do so enjoy those discussions.
But some good news: I bought the Complete English Poems of John Donne today. I felt it only appropriate to buy something like that with Mr. Hahm's graduation gift. Not to mention the fact that I love John Donne. His poetry is so intricate and wonderful. For example, The Good Morrow.
The Good-morrow

I wonder by my troth, what thou and I
Did, till we lov'd? Were we not wean'd till then,
But suck'd on country pleasures, childishly?
Or snorted we in the seven sleepers' den?
'Twas so; but this, all pleasures fancies be.
If ever any beauty I did see,
Which I desir'd, and got, 'twas but a dream of thee.

And now good morrow to our waking souls,
Which watch not one another out of fear;
For love, all love of other sights controls,
And makes one little room, an everywhere.
Let sea-discoverers to new worlds have gone,
Let maps to other, worlds on worlds have shown,
Let us possess one world, each hath one, and is one.

My face in thine eye, thine in mine appears,
And true plain hearts do in the faces rest;
Where can we find two better hemispheres,
Without sharp north, without declining west?
Whatever dies, was not mix'd equally;
If our two loves be one, or, thou and I
Love so alike, that none do slacken, none can die.

And more good news: I finished the New York Times crossword todayy. After stealing it out of a paper from Corner Bakery, I finished it with some help from my mom and from Heywood. I was exceedingly pleased with myself, even if Monday's is the easiest one. It is still pretty hard to finish one of those things. It took me a while, but I'm glad I stuck with it.
And still more good news: Andrew is almost in Italy. His flight left at 3:00, and it is about nine hours there. So, about three more hours until he lands. He promised me he would call before he left, but I guess he forgot about me. So much for that. :-( I know he'll have a great time. I am mostly just jealous, because I get to sit at home and blog while he is galavanting around Italy for sixteen days.
And it is my sister's birthday tomorrow. I only have a lame present for her, and that makes me sad. She is the best gift-giver. She can always come up with an innovative and sincere gift that everyone appreciates and comments on and remembers and genuinely wants to own. I come up with trite gifts, or useless things, or boring things. Never the really good ones. And this birthday is no different. I wish I had done better.

I love you, BBC.

Oh, those crazy Nepalese! The Maoist council said "Our party has issued special instructions to all cadres, the People's Liberation Army and other units not to carry out physical attacks on any unarmed person until another decision." Why does that take a special decision? How is that not just good policy? Ack. Anyway, the quote is taken from this BBC article about the aftermath of a landmine explosion that killed 38 innocents.
This is also a nice article from BBC about using seismic "geophones" to listen for elephants. Though admittedly impractical, it sounds really cool.
A story I like about how ancient Egypt rocked...
But this is my favorite. Using quantum mechanics, in such basic terms, to allow time travel. Quantum behaviour is governed by probabilities. Before something has actually been observed, there are a number of possibilities regarding its state. But once its state has been measured those possibilities shrink to one - uncertainty is eliminated.
So, if you know the present, you cannot change it. If, for example, you know your father is alive today, the laws of the quantum universe state that there is no possibility of him being killed in the past.
It is as if, in some strange way, the present takes account of all the possible routes back into the past and, because your father is certainly alive, none of the routes back can possibly lead to his death.
I love you, BBC.

Gone fishin'

Not exactly. But close enough. I am headed down to Springfield to be feasted tomorrow. I won a scholarship, so they invited me to lunch. It's pretty exciting. In any case, I shall return late Friday night (with burried treasure? I think so.)
The concert yesterday was lovely, even if the weather was uncooperative. We toughed it out, though. Mendelssohn is worth a little rain. And considering the misty nature of the rain, it was certainly bearable. The music was great, and the sound was fantastic. I can't wait to go again.
And in other news, there is no other news.

Bone of Contention?

Ok, it's a bad pun I borrowed from this neat BBC article about growing human bone in the form of a wedding ring. It's pretty cool, both from a scientific standpoint and from an artistic one.
Alice's party was a dance party. I had not been warned about this. I do not dance. So there you go.
That isn't to say that I didn't have a good time. I got to talk to some people that I wouldn't have otherwise, including Alex Schmidt and Zach Parsons, Eve and Mieka. And I got to play an aborted game of Tichu where Miriam and I rocked out. And the music was really good, even if it was dancing music.
And on the way home, several funny happenings. Andrew to Eve: You creamed me! (There was some éclair crème involved...) followed much later by Andrew to Mieka: You coked my hair! It's all artificial caramel coloring now!
Ok, maybe you had to be there.

Edison Graduation, take 2

As I walked into the gym this morning, I had the eerie feeling that I was missing my mortar board. I think I would have felt more at home in cap and gown than seated up on stage with Mrs. Gray, Mr. Springer and Mr. Barber. When I looked down at the graduates, I didn't actually see their faces most of the time. Instead, I saw my own classmates, now scattered and about to scatter much father. I saw Puran, Anthony, Sammy, Danielle, Monica, and Sophia, all sitting there waiting to turn that tassel. The people who were actually in front of me look like fourth graders, as if they hadn't changed at all since I left.
As great as it was to be back there, seeing all the teachers that I loved and still love, and seeing some of the brightest kids in the city wearing their gym uniforms, I felt out of place there. I have two alma maters now, but no real school. I don't go to Yale yet. I have hardly even been there. I have little enough right to call myself a Yalie. And so I am displaced, much as those eight graders are. They don't belong at Edison anymore, but they don't yet belong at Northside or Whitney or Lincoln. Highschools only have three classes over the summer, but they also have 5. 4 is the least appropriate.
I got a lot of praise for my speech, but I'm not really convinced. The speech itself, in its written form, I was pleased with. The delivery, though.... I think it could have been very bad. I have a very stiff mannner in that formal context, which usually doesn't serve me very well. In this case, I wasn't exactly sure what to do with the podium or microphone. My dad tells me that I didn't come off as nervous at all, but I think that is a lie. I know that once I got through the middle of the first page, I became more comfortable. I noticed that myself. So maybe I wasn't nervous seeming by the end.
And I forgot to bring my camera. So sorry, if you missed it you missed it. There are no pictures, and I have no video. Just the text of the speech and the collective memories of my parents and myself.

Summer To-Do List

See Body Worlds
Go to Shedd Aquarium (Crabs)
See the Symphony
Go to the Museum of Contemporary Art
See a movie in the park
Go to Lincoln Park Zoo
Go to a Sox game
Go to the Field Museum
See the Toulouse Lautrec exhibit
Have lunch with Aunt Susanna
Have lunch with Liz
Have lunch with Mrs. Schlaggar
Have lunch with Ethel
Have lunch with Mrs. Levin
Finish shopping for school
Pack
Send school email to teachers
Watch Pirates of the Caribbean
Go to the beach